Mar 22-25

Mar 22 (31/365) - Still not sure if I like that bubble umbrella - liked the angle and backlight on this, though.



Mar 23 (32/365) - A night reflection in my office window. I figured I might as well tell the truth about my schizophrenic day. Intentionally blurred.



Mar 24 (33/365) - Discovered a problem with white walls - they're SO boring. Had to make white space interesting, so I tried some motion on a slow exposure.



Mar 25 (34/365) - You would not believe how difficult this shot was, a mom running low on patience, a photographer frustrated with her subject (me, not the baby). It almost became "the day my dust project ended." But I got a shot that worked.

Aaaand I took a break last week to work on other stuff. More to come!

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 15-20 - Dust Project

Mar 15 (25/365) - A bit moody, this one. Liked it, though. Have to stop being scared of full-body shots here...



Mar 16 (26/365) - Not what I was going for, but the light was gorgeous.



Mar 17 (27/365) - Black and white with black and white in black and white. I was short on inspiration.



Mar 18 (28/365) - One of my four wedding dresses. Couldn't get it zipped, but it made for a pretty picture, with my birthday tulips from my husband.



Mar 19 (29/365) - Bedtime story. The blur just made it for me.



Mar 20 (30/365) - Trying out the new tripod. Also a new prop. Still not sure if I like.

Missed Mar 21 for shooting; will start next Monday with Mar 22.

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 14

(24/365)

I decided to play with my macro lens in the mirror today. Sometimes mirror shots take less time - sometimes they take more than setting the camera on the broken tripod and waiting for the shutter to go, again and again and again...

I'm hoping to get a new one for my birthday this week. And a remote for my camera. I think both will come in incredibly handy for this self-portrait project.

But didn't the macro bring this off beautifully? It's such a dreamy shot, soft in all the right places...

...

I've also decided that my self-portrait project will be my official 365 project this year, so I'm not counting 365 separately anymore.

Extra photos just get to be extra photos, no counting necessary. It's too much to track with two kids and a new house and other photography ideas I'm working on right now.

I am thinking that from here out, I will probably post my 365 photos in one or two posts per week, so I can use my photography blog for other things I'm shooting and processing too.

Or just leave it to sit for a day or two. You know. Because I have two kids and a new house and other photography ideas I'm working on right now.



This is me, checking out. Time to pick the house up so we get up clean on Monday...


(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 13

(22/dust)

The self-portrait almost defeated me today. But it couldn't overcome my good mood. Because it's spring outside. And my windows are all open. And the breeze is coming through smelling like home, because we have a boxwood hedge here, and boxwood is my Virginia scent.

So. Take that, camera! You can stare and click and blur at your leisure, but you can't embarrass me today!


(23/dust)



(23/365 SOOC)

Did I mention it is spring?



(Images © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 12 - A Little Dreamin'

(22/365)

And yes, I'm thinking about Paris. Dunno why. Maybe it's the lines on the Eiffel Tower, the thought of being somewhere I haven't ever been, hope for a little adventure that doesn't require any major planning because it pretty much can't happen with two kids under three and my health issues.

It makes for a nice mental getaway on a rainy day.

I'm slowly revealing the new house behind the photos - there is less cluttered space here, which is so nice for opening my eye up. The colors were a little weird today with the cloudy; I couldn't get my skin tone balanced right, so I went to a b/w conversion to save time.


(21/dust)


(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 11 - Me, Her Mama

(19/dust, 21/365)

Decided to have fun with the kid today - the bigger one who has had to do a lot of fending for herself recently.

I was on my back, working on a photo of my toes (which didn't come off, thank God - I needed those toes to shoot again another day!) and she lay down next to me on the floor.

And we did this before she got on my tummy and played for the shot above:


(20/dust)

Happy Thursday, and all that. The little one's awake now. Guess my time here is up!

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 10 - Learning Abandon

(17/dust, 20/365)

I almost never look in the mirror now - I don't have time.

I hate looking people in the eye. It leaves me too vulnerable.

I'm not a big fan of my post-baby body right now. Things stick out where they shouldn't stick out.

I wrestle every day with the whole principle of the thing. The practical reasons for the project are numerous, but they don't shut up the voices in my head that tell me I shouldn't take pictures of myself, just as I shouldn't spend too much time in front of a mirror, blah, blah, blah, blah.

I don't shoot beauty simply for the sake of beauty. Most times, the beauty I find is something to which my spirit responds, something that tells me about God, something that lifts my heart to Him.

Self-portraits don't do that for me yet.

As a photographer, I have to look at my own composition, my own focus, and decide whether it is a good photo. Never mind the expressions I manage just in time for the self-timer. I've never been a poser. I hate my own posed shots. I hate seeing my own concentration or fakeitude or discomfort.

I'm not really into the self-worth doctrine flying around the artistic world around whose edges I occasionally lurk. My worth comes from Christ; I am not ashamed to say this. It keeps me humble - and not in the groveling sense. In the sense that I am dust; I am NOT all that.

The catch for me is the concept of humbling myself as Jesus did to lay my own glory aside, despising my shame. Because there is no shame for me in Him.

I can capture that in anyone who knows Him.

Taking it for myself is another story.

This project is making me face me before God. It is a gut-wrenching, truth-telling experience I didn't expect. I see my face now; I am more aware of my attitudes and responses. I know how self-conscious I really am.

I hope to gain un-self-consciousness. There's something so beautiful about abandon. Living without measure. Life abundant.

...

Pulled out the wedding veil to mess with on a short shoot today, and had a hey-day with cropping in processing. I went a little closer with the lens - the house is still a mess. This was my second choice shot, no veil:


(18/dust)

I need to find some more people to photograph. Not that I have time.


(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 9 - This is a Test

(16/dust, 19/365)

Finally home, finally grabbing the camera again. I'm not so good at taking pictures when the place is crazy. I don't find beauty easily in the mess. I am trying to keep a few mostly-clear walls in this house (since we actually have the space for it now) to use for clean backgrounds.

I dropped the camera onto the couch (my tripod is broken, enough to send the camera end over end two weeks ago - broke the flash, but the camera and lens were okay, thank God) and set the self-timer, just to test. It was on an odd angle, which annoys me, but I don't have the time or energy to worry too much about it right now. The fact that I got a shot is in itself a feat, not to mention the shower, blow-dry, and clothing.

It's been a crazy couple of weeks.


(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Mar 4

(15/dust)

B and I caught a shadow framing us one day in my parents' laundry room. I figured I'd try for a silhouette. It didn't come out quite the way I'd hoped, but it's passable.


(18/365)

And then I found this in my mom's window. There is something mysterious about that gentle, etched reflection white against the dark...


(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 25

(13/dust)

I did not have much inspiration today. With my tripod officially broken, I am forced to figure out natural-type positions with the camera set up on whatever is handy. My non-dusted piano is helpful for setting things on - and for creating cool reflections.

And then there are the freebies - this vintage wedding dress I found in a wilted Gerbera this morning. Can't you just see her spinning?


(15/365)

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 24 - Me, a Mama

(12/dust, 14/365)

This year I'm working at expanding my eye beyond the intimate details to capture wider angles and tell more stories. I'm starting to see it happening, in spite of tripod issues and dropped cameras.

Really, I think it's just me needing to get out of my own way, be honest about the mess and the clutter I'm constantly trying to ignore at my house, stop escaping into details and start capturing my real life.

Real life is sometimes a bit angsty (see yesterday's photo), but it bears retelling anyway. It's what I do. If I can't tell my own story, what business do I have telling others'?

Shutter Sisters prompted a new look at me today. I don't know what to do with this new "mama" side of me. I look at myself, at the size of my hands compared to those of my children, and I'm realizing that I am the big person now, the grown-up. I'm the accessory to their "me" stories now, as my mom used to be with me.

She is my friend now. I have learned to see into her story.

The blur is not intentional - blur never is when you're parenting - but it's appropriate. There is so much out-of-focus beauty in this new life of mine. I'm enjoying the discovery.







(Images © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 23

(11/dust, 13/365)

I gave up on straight shots today. Tried something with flash on a slow exposure with a bit of motion. It's interesting, I'll give it that.

Here's to throwing my neck out again...

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 22

(10/dust, 12/365)

I didn't shoot yesterday. I was processing my shoot from Saturday afternoon. Today I'm up and dressed; I've been to the chiropractor and eaten breakfast, and my bed is even made. I only took a few shots, keeping things to a minimum, playing with the self-timer, and keeping most of me out of it.

One thing I am learning with my 365 project: every little bit I do helps - if it's figuring a new lighting situation out, taking risks with composition or poses, or getting myself into position in front of the timer a little faster. Ten seconds goes FAST when you move as slow as I tend to move.

But we still have a self-portrait today. This is me, pretending to read my newest book acquisition.

I'm at Chapter Four in this book about grace. L.L. Barkat's prose is poetic and compelling. Almost too compelling for me at the moment, when the last thing I want to think about is needing the grace that is getting me through the messes I am not strong enough to handle on my own. I'm tuning out the painful things she writes.

Or rather, I am trying to tune them out.

I think receiving grace is sometimes like shooting self-portraits - it requires humility to look into my own brokenness and embrace a God who allows it, who values me in spite of - almost because of - my mess.

The beauty in it is His own. He sees what I was meant to be. Sometimes, when I'm behind the camera catching me in front of the camera, I gain a glimpse.

Slowly, I'm letting go of the me I want to be, letting myself learn to be who I am, even if it's messy, even if who I am requires this hard and humbling grace.


(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 19 - In which the photographer hides from her camera

(11/365)

I just got off the phone with a blogging gal I've wanted to meet for a while. I just found out how incredibly introverted I am. I just retreated into my shell.

With a self-portrait to shoot.

Sigh.

The to-do list was a symbolic approximation of me today. It had my hand in it. I mean right?

Yeah, I know.


So I tried shooting red and white and denim down. I was fresh today. Dressed.

Efficient and dressed. Yeah, still not doing it for my own rules. I thought about scrapping the project.


A little more - a lot less. A literal dust project.

Okay, okay.


(9/dust)

But that's as far as I can go today. I'm scared of seeing any more of me today after hearing so much of my own voice on the phone.

I have seriously got to get out more.


(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 18 - Freeze

(8/Dust, 10/365)

I hate photography sometimes. It tells the truth. Sometimes it's a truth about happy, about love, about others. With a self-portrait project, it tells the truth about me.

I didn't expect that.

I don't know what I expected, actually. I've done enough head shots in the mirror that I figured I'd just get frustrated with myself. But I hadn't done the timer thing. Hadn't stood nervous in front of the lens, trying to figure out what to look like. Hadn't had my picture taken when I was alone with myself and my thoughts, when I was having a good day - or even a bad day.

As a photographer, I have to accept the quality of the photos I'm shooting here. I can't just keep shooting until I'm in a good mood, because I have two kids and a life to live. But as a person, it's hard to be so honest.

Pictures are meant to be seen. I don't shoot the things I want to keep private. But I'm an introvert, believe it or not. Words are one thing. Pictures - they're another.

These last few weeks have stop-start time for me. I am wavering between too many decisions, trying to figure out my priorities, trying to balance a constant-moving schedule, trying to regain my footing after Bredon's birth. It takes me longer than it takes some people, I think.

The song going through my head today is Switchfoot's Dare You to Move - "like today never happened before..."

It's the theme of my life lately.

Mercies new every morning. Grace for this honest, and Truth that doesn't end with me. A daily dare to live and move and have my being in Christ.

And every moment isn't like the frozen moments:





(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 17

(7/Dust)

The SP ended up frustrating me today. I've lost my camera attachment to put the thing on the tripod, so I wasted a bit of shooting time digging around the house for it. Sigh.

I'm noticing a trend about my self-portraits. I'm hiding. As much as I can, I hide my eyes, shooting only parts of me, putting things in front of me, using my children as props. It's an interesting psychological thing, I'm sure. I'm so unused to finding myself in front of the camera - I don't know what to do! It's easier to just shoot into the mirror and glare at myself, check my facial expression as I go. Standing in front of the timer, waiting for the shot - that's HARD.

I think it's going to be good for me. And for my clients.

Aaannd here are a few of the rest I shot.

About the flowers: I picked up some leftover V-day flowers at Walmart after B's appointment this morning. I was ostensibly stopping just to pick up juice for P, who threw up her breakfast, but we got sidetracked, so we brought home flowers too.


My silly girl. (no#/overshoot freebie)


"GSOOC" - Gerbera, straight out of the camera... (9/365)

And this is one of my V-day tulips. My husband braved Friday night's snow to pick them up for me, to bring a smile for me on a rough day.


I know, I know - macro lens again. But I was ON today! (no#/overshoot freebie)

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 16

8/365, 6/Dust

Does it need words, really?

And why don't I make this shot my entry for this month's Greeblepix Contest? There's no theme, and this is the best of my recent work, so here goes!

Thanks for the fun, Aimee!

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Feb 15

3/Dust

It's one of those days. Everything is a bit blurry. My thoughts are scattered. I'm not quite so familiar as I'd like to be with my camera self-timer.

But here are couple of photos from today's ten-minute shoot.


4/Dust


5/Dust


7/365 (Piper's Fwlower)

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)

Photography Projects

2/Dust (Feb 14)


I have been toying with the idea of a 365 project again this year, since I'm shooting nearly every day with a new baby in the house anyway. I'm gonna add a twist for myself, though. I'm holding myself accountable for at least one self-portrait per week, a "dust project," if you will, to get some humanity into my work, to learn to view myself with a little objectivity, and to get some experience with tripod, perspective, and self-timer.

And while I will try to shoot every day, I'll have to be a little forgiving on my 365. I'll just see what happens, eh? It's time to make this a working blog again.

Here's the backstory, starting February 7.



1/Dust (Feb 14)



6/365 (Feb 14)



5/365 (Feb 13)



4/365 (Feb 12)



3/365 (Feb 10)



2/365 (Feb 8)



1/365 (Feb 7)

(Image © Informal Moments Photography)